So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
