I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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