Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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