hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
