what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
