that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
