Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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