At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
