i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize
