Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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