Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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