so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
