i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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