I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
