she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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