Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
