God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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