This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
