No, you can still breathe under the balls.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize