I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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