My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Girls should come with a carfax report
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
