Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
