she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
