living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
