Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize