I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
