just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize