Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
