He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
