you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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