So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We're too hungover to prance.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
