I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
