So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
