is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
