You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
