The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
