it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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