no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Actions speak louder than pants.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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