my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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