I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
