first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
