she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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