Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Randomize
