Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
You're earring is so big in my mouth
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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