scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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