So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
