she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
BRING THE BAGELS
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
