Whod you bang
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize