I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
