Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
