We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
they're like a gay fantastic four
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
